Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
Randomize
