so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
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