it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
Randomize
