Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
my biography would be titled "haunting truths and dick jokes: a tale of love, loss, and masturbation."
Randomize
