I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
dude you were so wasted last night you ate a sandwich made out of tomatos, cheese, doritos, salt & pepper. Then you heated it in the micro for 5 min to melt the cheese.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
I just realized my hands still smell like your cock. Which is awesome, but I wonder if the clerk at the store appreciated it.
I feel bad. I'm the reason hand sanitizer exists.
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
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