I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
Randomize
