i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
So my mom wants to hear about my weekend. How do I make licking cupcake frosting off your face while high not sound like just that?
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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