At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
