For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You don't take my phone while I'm passed out, have a three hour conversation on it with Dealer Dave, set up a date with him and NOT TELL HIM THAT HE'S NOT TALKING TO ME.
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
My night just got really weird. In a sit down stall bathroom at this nice resturaunt and this guy walks in as I rip a humongous porcelain-splitting fart. Well, I hear him stop for a second. He then opens the door to the stall next to mine, sits down and says, "player two has entered the game."
Did you win?
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
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