What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why the fuck did you text me at 4 in the morning telling me not to have sex with the bird?
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
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