I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
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