do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
WHY IS THERE NO EMOJI FOR "FUCK MY MOM JUST SAW MY SEX BRUISES?!"
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
He caught me shoving meatballs into my mouth using my hand. Fuck utensils. It’s Christmas...and this is why I’m single.
They are good meatballs.
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Randomize