idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
Randomize
