they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
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