I bet he comes in French.
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
Just realized I probably only have one more wedding where I can say I fucked the bride.
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
Randomize
