Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
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Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
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