just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
I knew you were super hungover. But so hungover you fire our house cleaner because her vacuums too loud is excessive
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
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