how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
Also cheers for the reminder to check last night's texts. It's been a magical adventure through drunk me's thought process.
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
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