I kiss like a newly born barfing kangaroo
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
Randomize