I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
I know it's early but when you wake up can you please validate my life and tell me I'm not just a drunk idiot.
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
Randomize
