I fell asleep on the toilet again last night...
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
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