you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
Randomize
