return my video game
I'm laying in your front yard are you home
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
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