ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
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