check it out our google latitudes are spooning
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
Woke up chewing my pillow from a dream where I was scarfing Cajun pasta from TGI Friday's. That's a new level of fat, even for us
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
Randomize