I dont know whether to be proud of myself for not driving, or being proud that i was so messed up I couldnt drive
no, he came in my armpit
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
Randomize
