Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
Panda onesie. Pizza. Netflix. Wrapped up like a burrito. Screw you guys and your cute relationships THIS IS WHAT INFINITE HAPPINESS TASTES LIKE
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
Randomize
