words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
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