I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
im holly from the hills drunk
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
Dude, we got to the strip club as they were closing, and you starting crying because, and I quote, "This is the closest to birthday sex I'm gonna get."
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
I think I've been inadvertently participating in a contest to see how many times I can show up to work hungover in my first year of teaching. And I'm the only participant. Not sure if I'm winning or losing.
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
Randomize
