did i leave my keys in your car? BTW: sorry for throwing that drink on your date.
I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
Randomize
