There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
Her facebook status said "just got a sign from god". I texted her and apparently she found a slice of pizza in the shower.
You almost married that.
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
I climbed up on the tank of the toilet so I could take a slo-mo vid of myself pissing into the garbage can, but the base of the toilet shattered and I had to bail.
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
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