Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
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so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
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