Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
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