I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
My phone now changes "me" to "mrrrrrrrrh", thank you new years.
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
My brother just woke up to see me on te couch dipping hamburger buns into pizza sauce. I'm beginning to question the life choices that led to this moment.
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?