dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
Randomize
