i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
Last night I crashed my housemates tinderdate, smoked his weed and then left. He felt too awkward to say no.#Empowerment
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
Randomize