Non-Jews are for practice
thus making me awesome and them whores
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
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