i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
There should be a company that sends nadgrams. They're like candy grams except the recipient gets kicked in the balls.
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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