dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
WELP I KNOW THE HAPPY HOUR DRINKS WERE GOOD BECAUSE MOM JUST INFORMED ME I AM THE RESULT OF POKED HOLE IN THE DIAPHRAGM
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
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