he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
You were face down in the punch bowl, humming the theme to jaws
That explains the stains on my shirt
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
Randomize
