Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
How's work?
Spinning.
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
