i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
I miss vodka workout Fridays
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
Randomize
