Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
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The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
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The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
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