Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
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