i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
Randomize