i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
I'm smoking pot with a man in a pink suit, size 15 wide shoes who bought his bowl from a place called Chinese Bling Bling while I'm dressed as a unicorn drinking pumpkin beer
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
That awkward moment when you realize you've been secretly blackout dating someone for three months. Drunk me is in a committed relationship.
Randomize
