And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
I cheated on you last night. I slept with my laptop.
Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
That moment when you’re at the doctor to give a sperm sample you’re only getting 3G so the porn is buffering
Randomize
