if i can run in heels then i can drive
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
I tried to order dominos and couldn't but I accidentally placed an order for this morning. I knew I did it last night and was gonna call and cancel this morning but honestly it's coming in 30 minutes and I need it
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
