I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
I'm drunk and in a paddle boat and my friend won't quit yelling about pandas. Does this ever happen to you?
Randomize