I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
I might be the strongest willed bouncer ever. Earlier tonight a girl flashed me trying to get in. I just replied "Sorry I'm gay", she believed me and left.
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
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