i just took a sip of diet coke and i said " as soon as it hits my lips i wanna smoke a cig." then i thought of your dick.
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
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