Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
Randomize
